The heartfelt comedy/drama “Rhythm Is a Dancer” is based on writer/director Lauren Caster’s real-life experience of meeting her biological father.
Ro (Caster) decides to move back in with her lesbian mother, Susan (Amy Aquino), after losing her job and ending a relationship. But Susan — a single mother who raised her daughter with the help of a “lesbian wolf pack” — has always been tough on her daughter. She wants the best for Ro, who has not found success as a dancer and, now, about to turn 30, needs to grow up. Ro, however, wants to find her own way in life. She does not tell Susan that she has made contact with her sperm donor father, Gregory (Tate Donovan). Of course, the gulf between mother and daughter widens when the truth comes out.
Aquino makes a strong impression with her steely performance playing her costar/director’s real-life mother. The character actress spoke with Gay City News about making “Rhythm Is a Dancer.”
I expect you met Lauren’s real-life mother to help inform your portrayal. What mannerisms or traits did Lauren’s mom pass along to you?
Lauren’s mom has a very specific stance — it’s that military thing — and walk, which is very different from mine. When I realized I had to play pickleball, and I don’t play pickleball, I arranged to have a lesson. Her mom, who plays, set up a game and I got a real sense of her. I’m not gay, but I found it odd [Lauren/Ro] kept referring to Susan in the script as a butch lesbian. Her mom is solid, two feet on the ground woman. She’s delightful, wonderful, funny, and sweet, but her gravity was very different from mine. That as the main thing; she’s hips forward, which helped me play her.
Susan is intense and brutally honest; she is a planner, she is competitive at pickleball, and she is critical of her daughter. We also learn some surprising things about her, like about her dating men in the military. What backstory did you give her?
I was in the military, so that I knew. My generation, and I’m a little older than Lauren’s mom — hardly anyone was out at the time. It wasn’t that long ago. It was not common at all, and women are more polymorphous perverse; we are attracted to anything that is beautiful. My first crush was on a girl in sixth grade. It wasn’t hard for me to see Susan being attracted to cute guys in the military, and it was much safer for her to have sex with a guy than a woman in the military at that time.
I felt it was a strong decision for her to have a kid on her own. I admire women who do that. It was great she had her other friends around to provide the softer, more nurturing things. Susan’s relationship with Ro is more as a loving dad than as mom.
Susan does loves her daughter, but it pains her to see Ro flail. How did you develop the dynamic between them?
I think Susan works really hard to give Ro space. I could have made her more critical. I think she’s been unbelievable patient with her daughter and allows her to find her own way. You want to live here? You’re going to work from day one. She’s setting those limitations for her. Susan has always recognized that Ro is kind of lost in this world. It’s a shame that Susan didn’t understand that it is because Ro didn’t know her dad. But Ro didn’t share that with Susan. In real life, Lauren’s mom was in on her looking for her bio-dad.
I like that in the film, Ro doesn’t tell Susan about Gregory, because I think that creates tension between them.
Susan says to her, “It’s not that you’re looking for him, it’s that you didn’t tell me and trust me enough to share that with me or felt I wouldn’t understand it, or I would be hurt.” Susan knows Ro isn’t settled, so to find that out that she’s been keeping that secret for five years [devastates her]. She is not hypercritical. She is just saying, “You’ve been pushing at this [dancing] for a long time. It’s a really hard business; it’s not working for you. That’s okay, find something else to do. It’s probably that time.” I think Lauren intended this relationship to be basically good, and if there is a problem, it is Ro’s problem that she needs to work out on how to be more open. It is not that Susan is a bad mom.
Susan is hurt because Ro pulls away from her, but there is the idea that Susan needs to let go a little. What do you think about Susan’s reaction when she discovers Ro has connected with Gregory?
I felt it was a very healthy, straightforward no bullshit reaction. It wasn’t all neurotic. She seethes right outside.
Susan likes to “yell it out” when she is feeling frustrated or angry. What is your coping mechanism for stress?
When I am frustrated and angry I curse. “Fuck me” can happen a lot. I make myself a cocktail. My drink is vodka, rocks, water and Batch 22, which is a really delicious Aquavit that I invested in. (You can get it at Total Wines.) I make myself feel better by organizing things that are a mess. I raise monarch butterflies, and even in the middle of the night, I’ll clean them and that calms me down.
You are known as a character actress, what is the appeal of making indie films like “Rhythm Is a Dancer?”
I have been desperate to do a small independent film because it’s where I get to create a whole person and take them through this arc. I’m playing my 20th judge. I’m not exaggerating. I love doing it. It’s in “Lincoln Lawyer,” and fantastic writing and I’m having a blast, but I think I’ve done 18-20 judges in my career. I have this personality that can be intimidating and controlling, etc. so that’s what I tend to get to play. In a smaller independent film, I can really start as one person and turn into another in the end. I was thrilled to do this. When Lauren came to me and specifically wanted me, I was very touched and flattered. I was very excited to have that freedom and the opportunity to play Susan and to collaborate — because it’s not being made by committee. It’s being made by her, and she’s open to my ideas and suggestions. It felt good. It was like when you do a play, and help create things, rather than stepping into something fully formed and finding my way to fit in it.
Lauren Caster and Tate Donovan will participate in post-screening Q&A on July 16 and 17.
“Rhythm Is a Dancer” | Directed by Lauren Caster | Opening July 16 at the Roxy Cinema | Distributed by Circle Collective/Utopia Distribution
